The most successful family businesses I work with have strong, healthy relationships as a foundation of their family.
One of the fundamental skills we coach to maintain healthy relationships is the ability to show genuine appreciation for others even in the face of disagreement and turmoil.
Many clients tell me they are reluctant to say something nice about someone they’re angry with because they think they will be acting insincere or phony.
I believe you can be legitimately angry or disappointed and still be able to hold genuine appreciation. Showing appreciation is like “making a deposit“ in your relationship account with someone. Building positive energy in a relationship gives you more room to work on tough issues when they arise.
Practice this skill this weekend! Are you ready? You can do this!
Do this with as many people as you can in your family. The stretch goal is to do it with the person you have either the weakest relationship or a strained relationship.
Here we go…
Say “I wanted to let you know what I really appreciate about you is…(fill in the blank)”
Examples:
- …how dedicated you are to our family/our parents /your children/my children
- …how much you care about everybody
- …how hard you work at being a good _______(their profession)
- …how you were always there for me
You get the idea?
Some clients tell me, “I would if I could think of one coach!” And when I push and challenge them. they always come up with something they appreciate and I’m often surprised how touching it is when they do.
So rack your brain – and come up with one.
Being able to observe and articulate redeeming qualities of someone is a skill in and of itself. The sooner you build that muscle the sooner you’ll have healthy strong relationships!
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